One of my friends sent this to me
What it means to be Australian
Being Australian is about driving in a German car to an Irish pub for a
Belgian beer, then travelling home, grabbing an Indian curry or a
Turkish kebab on the way, to sit on Swedish furniture and watch American
shows on a Japanese TV. Oh and...... Only in Australia ... can a pizza
get to your house faster than an ambulance. Only in Australia ... do
supermarkets make sick people walk all the way to the back of the shop
to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at
the front. Only in Australia ... do people order double cheeseburgers,
large fries and a DIET coke. Only in Australia ... do banks leave both
doors open and chain the pens to the counters. Only in Australia ... do
we leave cars worth thousands of dollars on the drive and lock our junk
and cheap lawn mower in the garage. Only in Australia ... do we use
answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we
won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first
place. Only in Australia ... are there disabled parking places in front
of a skating rink. NOT TO MENTION... 3 Aussies die each year testing if
a 9v battery works on their tongue. 142 Aussies were injured in 1999 by
not removing all pins from new shirts. 58 Aussies are injured each year
by using sharp knives instead of screwdrivers. 31 Aussies have died
since 1996 by watering their Christmas tree while the fairy lights were
plugged in. 19 Aussies have died in the last 3 years believing that
Christmas decorations were chocolate. Aussie Hospitals reported 4 broken
arms last year after cracker pulling accidents. 101 people since 1999
have had broken parts of plastic toys pulled out of the soles of their
feet. 8 Aussies had serious burns in 2000 trying on a new jumper with a
lit cigarette in their mouth. A massive 543 Aussies were admitted to
Emergency in the last two years after opening bottles of beer with their
teeth. 5 Aussies were injured last year in accidents involving out of
Control Scalextric cars. And finally......... In 2000 eight Aussies
cracked their skull whilst throwing up into the toilet. IF YOU'RE PROUD
TO BE AUSTRALIAN SEND THIS ON!